If that isn't hard enough to do with your own family, it must be next to impossible when you first get married. This week one of our topics was communications in a relationship. You grow up with an unspoken language or as they are often called unspoken rules; you know like looks that are passed between people that send a very distinct message or body posture that tells you mom or dad is upset and the best thing to do at that particular moment is to run for the hills. There are the things that are expected of you and you don't need to be told to do them, you just do because that's the way the family operates and functions. You know the rules in your family from experience and the older you get the more natural it all becomes.
Now suddenly you are joining another person's family and have to learn all of their unspoken rules. This can be done one of two ways; either you ask questions to clarify events and make sure you aren't reading too much or too little into what happens...or you assume you know exactly what's going on and end up fighting fairly often because you see no reason why they didn't understand what you meant by an action or a comment. Personally I would prefer to go the with the first option. You just have to remember that your partner grew up differently than you did and needs a little bit of help understanding your crazy tendencies. No worries they still love you. They married you didn't they. If you're as crazy as I am that's an accomplishment in and of itself.
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